The days are long, but the years are short. Cherish every moment - they'll grow up before you know it. Make memories and messes and meaningful connections.
It's all true. Every bit of it. But when we're desperately trying to be Jesus to our little blessings, those words hold such weight. Such responsibility. Such pressure. Over time, that pressure can make these truths a burden we were never meant to carry. That burden can grow heavy as those reminders shine brightly on all the ways we are failing. 
This morning. I read a beautiful post by another blogger. I even shared it on my facebook page. I started the day aware that I wanted to embrace my children, and the moments we are given to share. I wanted to have a perfectly special day, celebrating my Dad's birthday. I even worked hard yesterday to make sure I could focus on creating an atmosphere of peace and joy today.
But, the day didn't go as I'd planned. Little thing-after-thing-after-thing plucked at my nerves until I got frustrated. Then I got frustrated at myself for being frustrated. Maybe I'm the only one who has ever found myself in that vicious cycle, but it isn't pretty - and it can be awful hard to get out of. Before I knew it, I was explaining my reactions, justifying my responses, and heaping guilt on thick. "Sweet Jesus, I just want to be like You... but I'm so far off..." the thought is louder than the reminders, but it hurts, too. I know I need Jesus --- but there are days I feel I should be so much further along... Further along than what, though? Further along than needing to admit in every situation I need Him? Further along than acknowledging every good and perfect gift comes from Him, and not from me? 
He must increase, but I must decrease. John the Baptist John 3:30
John was preparing the way for the Lord. He knew he wasn't the Savior, and he freely admitted it. He was an outcast from society, who ate and dressed... uniquely. He was chosen, ordained, anointed, called, appointed, CREATED for the mission God has designed for him - to prepare people for Jesus' coming. He lived a holy, set apart life from the time of his birth, and when it came time to step back and acknowledge that Jesus was who his disciples needed - His response was clear: He must increase, but I must decrease.
As mommas who are preparing the way for Jesus in our little people's hearts, that should be our response, too. The thing is, it's easy to embrace the idea, but another to embrace the execution... In other words, saying "I must decrease" sounds right and good, but doing it can be hard and feel like failing. We should never stop growing closer to Jesus, and allowing His light and love to change us from the inside out. Yet, throughout our lives, we will undoubtedly encounter times when that transformation into His likeness is a process of removing attitudes, habits, and mindsets that are not in alignment with His. So, here's the thing. After grabbing my laptop to pour out my heart about feeling like a failure of a mom, I've realized two things: 1. I am NOT failing at being a mom. 2. I am TOTALLY failing at being a substitute Jesus. Moms make mistakes. Moms lose their temper and forget things. They sometimes get priorities mixed up and have to reboot. But it's okay - they apologize, love fiercely, and do their best moving forward. I'm not failing at that. And my guess is, neither are you. Our kids aren't too much for me, but I'm not enough for them. Only Jesus is.
Jesus can't be replaced. He's the only One perfect and the only One capable of saving. It isn't my job to be Jesus to my little people. It's my job to prepare the way for Him. And even on days like today, when my imperfections are obvious to everyone around me (oh the shame!), HE NEVER FAILS my kiddos - and He never fails me.
So if you feel like you're failing, ask yourself: am I doing what God's asked of me, and allowing Jesus His rightful place as Savior? Have I taken on things God never asked of me?
18 Comments
3/19/2017 10:37:36 pm
Your blog is lovely and I'm so glad I clicked over from the E group.
Beth
3/19/2017 11:20:16 pm
Totally agree! My mom has reminded me many a time, if I was a perfect mom, could provide a perfect upbringing, my kids wouldn't need Jesus... that would defeat the whole point. It is GOOD that we cannot fill every single need our children have. It is GOOD for them to have their own independent relationship with the creator. Then they get the chance to learn He is the one who will always always always be there. Not easy on a Momma's pride, but oh so good for both moms and children to learn. 💕 3/21/2017 08:12:46 am
Beth, your mom is very wise! Now I know where you get it from! :) Learning to let go of our pride is definitely a critical part of being the moms God desires us to be! 3/20/2017 11:34:25 am
We all make mistakes! How wonderful that God is so patient and loving towards us - what a great lesson as we deal with our children! 3/21/2017 08:13:42 am
Yes! I am certainly grateful for His ever present patience and love! I hope to be a mom some day and this is reassuring for me. Motherhood seems overwhelming and scary to me. I mess up so much already and I'm scared that if I am not perfect, I won't be doing enough for my children or I will be failing them. This was a great reminder that the only one who will ever be perfect is Jesus. Thank you, friend! 3/21/2017 08:17:27 am
Goodness, Danielle! I'm so glad this encouraged you! Being a mom is such an incredible blessing... but it can be overwhelming and scary, for sure! As a mom, God is so faithful to show up - so gentle and compassionate - not only with and for our children, but with and for us, too! Hey, i don't think this post necessarily just applies to mums. I know I feel like I'm failing a lot, in my job, my relationships, my walk with God and so many other areas. We all need to realise that we are not doing as badly as we think we are. This might be even more true for the singletons who are forever being bombarded with questions as to why they are single, or font have kids yet, and it's just assumed that they will volunteer at everything and spend so much more time on their job, because they don't have kids. I think that the pressure is real for everyone. Just in different ways for people in different situations 3/21/2017 08:22:44 am
Alice, thank you so much for your feedback! You are right - many people from all walks of life feel like they are failing. I hope that this encouraged you in your season of life --- that you are not failing in your job, relationships, or with God! I am sorry you have encountered unrealistic expectations from others! It is a challenge to handle demands from others in a way that brings God glory and sets healthy boundaries! I'll be praying that moving forward you are able to do that, and that His freedom would be louder than the demands of those around you! 3/21/2017 08:26:26 am
Yes! Love "God chooses to partner with us in all our faults and imperfections and yet can still help us be good Mamas to our children." <--- THAT is His beautiful grace at work in and through us! 3/20/2017 05:21:26 pm
This reminds me of the quote “All mothers are a quiet servant of necessity, doing the work no one would notice or thank her for – no one, that is, except Him to whom it could be offered as a daily sacrifice of love. “ (Elizabeth Elliot) 3/21/2017 08:10:43 am
Anna, what a beautiful quote! Thank you for taking the time to share. I'm grateful these words reminded you you are NOT a failure! God is so faithful - and Jesus is gracious and able to be each of our Savior! 3/22/2017 04:11:13 pm
Oh my. I needed this today. I found myself reading intently all the way through, where I can tend to be a skimmer. I'm in one of those vicious cycles you talk about! After having our second baby, our first baby girl, almost 2 months ago I think I'm also struggling a little with PPD again. Oh how I need Jesus! I need to get back to forcing quiet time into my day even when a million other things are calling me. Thank you for that reminder! <3 3/23/2017 12:28:59 am
Naomi, 4/17/2017 09:30:04 am
What a great and lovely post! I enjoyed how you flipped it around to failing as a substitute Jesus. This line especially spoke to me: "But it's okay - they apologize, love fiercely, and do their best moving forward. I'm not failing at that. And my guess is, neither are you." Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
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Hi there!Adventures in faith, family, adoption, homeschooling, and training up a tribe to follow hard after Jesus are spilled into these posts --- most often written with a cup of coffee in hand. I hope you'll stick around a while and find something that brings you hope! get your copy of my book today!how i keep up!
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